Recently, I commented in reply to Madonna Robinson’s blog post (ad) Is awareness Enough For You? My reply turned out to be quite lengthy. I figured I might as well share it further. So… I have posted the copy of that blog comment here for you…
Awareness is just that, “awareness”. Nothing more, nothing less. It is simply the open door.
Sometimes it can present a brief glimpse of where we could go to work. Other times, becoming aware of something can occur like a bolt of lightning which really jolts us into making a monumental decision and to take firm action.
What to do with new found knowledge, once we become aware of something that we might want to change? Do we bury it, do we begin the changes, do we step onto a new path, do we go into denial, do we blame? A decision is needed.
We can make conscious or unconscious decisions. The unconscious ones usually come from a place of ‘automatic’ which simply serve to keep us stuck in the places we have always found ourselves. The conscious decisions are more powerful because we truly choose those, fully aware that we are choosing & what we are choosing.
A conscious decision comes from a place of accepting personal responsibility 100%. Once we do that, we can either choose to hang onto the blame, the limiting beliefs, our past, or… we can take steps to move our life in a different direction.
We might then see a range of possible actions that could help us to step onto that fresh path. If we take no deliberate action to transform the situation, or ourselves, then of course, nothing changes.
Actions might include, less time with certain friends, more time with empowering friends, seeking a new workplace, booking a holiday, having a conversation with a friend or family member, replacing particular habits, reframing our beliefs, participating in programs that might give us tools to help keep us stepping forward into the direction that we now want to go.
Distinguish between “moving towards” type of goals as opposed to “moving away from” goals. There is more power and energy in those goals that move us towards what we want, than to keep looking in a rear view mirror and working on goals that focus on moving us away from a situation. Whatever we focus on, WILL expand!
It’s beneficial too, to take a look at the benefits we are receiving from hanging on to our old “stuff”. We tend to move toward that which gives us pleasure and away from pain. If something is not shifting, what is the pay-off that we derive from hanging onto it, what ‘feels good & safe’ about dwelling in that “place”? What is the pain or fear that we associate with moving towards something different? Things that get rewarded and appreciated, get done!
Awareness is not a destination, it too is only a tool. The destination is whatever we declare it to be. If the destination is ‘peace of mind’, then we need clarity of how that would “look” and manifest itself in our life, in a tangible way. Once we have clarity of that vision, we then have a destination. If the destination is an improved relationship, then what would that “look” like? What actions or requests could then achieve the desired outcome?
It’s very well to say we want to leave home and then start out on a road trip, however do we just grab any old suitcases and hop onto any mode of transport we can find, without knowing where we want the journey to take us?
By not declaring a destination, it is like saying, “I don’t know, I just want to get away from home!” We just keep looking back at ‘home’ to see how far away from it we’ve got. Meanwhile, we’re not seeing the wonderful new surrounds in which we’ve now found ourselves.
We often DO know what needs doing and what would make THE difference and we’re just not stepping into that space, for a variety of reasons (usually based in fear of one kind or another).